Feelings

As most of you probably know, john and i just celebrated our three year wedding anniversary. I guess its got me thinking. Why did he chose me? I mean when i look back, the man i met wasn't planning on marriage.. i doubt the thought had ever really crossed his mind. Yet when we met, the feelings were almost immediate. It was like we were one unit, separated into two pieces.. like we were made for each other. I mean what else explains how fast it all went by. We knew.. I would say within the first two and a half months, we knew that we would be together forever. I remember him staring at me while i was sleeping one night, when we had only been together a few weeks.. And i could see how much he cared for me. Withing five months of starting our relationship, we were engaged. A year and a month after starting our relationship, we were married. I know there were some that thought we must have been getting married for other reasons, but they were wrong. We loved each other, we wanted to be married.

I know i wasn't looking for marriage, or even a serious relationship for that matter. I was 18.. i was at the height of my freedom..lol.. But honestly something about him changed things in me. I remember visiting my grandma and her saying.. i can tell Christine, i can tell you are really happy for once in your life. And i was, i was so happy.. all the bad things that happened in the past no longer mattered. I had a future.. one that involved a wonderful man and the family and life we wanted to create. We discussed having kids before we were engaged..

I know how much he loves me and that he has sacrificed some things for me. I guess i just wonder, why me? Whats so special about me? Why do i deserve such a wonderful guy...